I'm so over this. They need to find an actual cure for mental illnesses. Like, yesterday.
Six days ago, I dropped into depression like Henry VIII dropped Anne Boleyn. It was so fast that I didn't even know what was happening (unlike poor Anne), and it lasted five days. Today, again without warning, I was booted into hypo-mania.
Hypo is dangerous, for me. I struggle with weight, and hypo makes me so bored that I just start mindlessly eating. Yes, I have Speks (get yours here), but sometimes, my mind gets going so fast, and my energy so low, that I'm in this haze. Trying to keep myself entertained in Hypo mode is like trying to prove that Lizzie Borden didn't do it. It goes in circles, nothing works, nothing getting done, with my brain spinning so fast I can actually feel my brain (if that makes any sense), and I'm in Hell.
Things I couldn't focus on tonight:
- TV
- Music
- Books
- Schoolwork (is it an adverb or an adjective?)
- Walking
- Applying lotion (don't ask)
- Work (probably should have been first on this list...)
- Conversation (which is a majority of my job)
- Tying my shoes (funny and painful)
- Thinking
- Breathing
- Sitting
- Standing
That list could go on, but as expected, I can't focus on what I couldnt focus on.
I hate this.
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