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I'm on a mission to save the world! Or maybe just to find the perfect mac and cheese.
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Friday, June 20, 2014

Excited much?

Ok, 2 posts in 1 day probably won't happen like, ever again. I just had to update some things then rant for a minute. But... I changed the colour of my blog to green since the awareness ribbon for Bipolar Disorder is, well, green. Yeah. See what I did there? ;)

Ok, so I just got home from what has got to go down in history as the most awkward first date ever! Since I've always got a billion thoughts running thru my head, I tend to talk a lot when I get nervous and it's usually something absolutely ridiculous that I then have to cover for by saying something even worse. Worst part: I talk freely. No boundaries, no rules, no limit to the amount of pure stupidity spewing from my mouth. This is why I never get the second date. I come off as weird, and instead of giving it time and getting comfortable, guys just see weird and run. Nobody takes the time to get to know me anymore. I mean, in school, you were stuck with certain people so much that you got to know them and understand them. Now, the first impression is everything!

I. Don't. Make. A. Good. First. Impression.

I haven't actually made a new friend in years! I'll meet someone, like at work, and everything's great, until I get a little more comfortable... Yeah, I can be loud(ish), and I get bursts of uncontrollable energy, but it's not my fault and believe me, if I could control it, I most definitely would! But I can't! You get excited and you say "awesome!" When I get excited, I talk about it... a lot, and fast, and kinda loud. I get energy that I really wish would just go away. I literally can't think about anything besides whatever it is, which can make everything else difficult, if not impossible. Driving is loads of fun, let me tell you.

Fun example: I was listening to the radio, and this song came on that I really liked. I didn't know who did it and missed when they announced it. Next time it was on, I noticed it was One Direction (don't judge). So I looked it up on YouTube, and guess what... they're kinda cute. I watched more videos and "cute" turned into "hot." Welp... things escalated quickly and I now have a 1D calendar, Louis posters in my closet, and I'm pretty sure I know more about them than any 12-year-old girl in the world. This has been an episode of "Confessions of an Adult One Direction Fangirl."

FACT: Energy cannot always be contained. Learn before you judge.


  1. I want to hear more about your 1D obsession! Sounds awesome!

    1. It's a late night program. It gets a little disturbing ;)

  2. Is this something that you are having problems with internally (a problem with yourself), or is it more how external people perceive you?

    1. It's both. I know that I get that way, but I've also herd it from others.