Today, I did something that I most literally have never done, before. I woke up, entirely intent that I didn’t want to go to work today. Since my very first job, thoughts like this have won, and I wouldn’t go to work. This was a day of immense change.
Despite not wanting to go, I got up, got dressed, and got to work. Just forty minutes into my day, I was beyond done. I wanted to get out of there, go home, and go back to bed. For the first time in my life, I pushed those thoughts from my mind, and made it through my entire shift! Granted, my shift is just four hours, but that’s never stopped my brain from winning, as I would talk myself out of a two-hour shift at one job. Gotta say, I’m pretty proud of myself, today.
Those four hours passed about as well as a kidney stone, and I was counting every single minute, but I was there! And what’s more, I did things, all by myself, which I’d not been confident on, up until today! I’m actually learning my job! No, I’m not totally independent, but there are no less than sixty million things to know. But learning some of the more common and basic functions, is rather a boost to my confidence and self-esteem!
I still can’t believe how far I’ve come! Three years ago, I needed someone to go with me to get the freaking mail. No joke. I’m surprising myself on a daily basis!
I’m walking proof that anything is possible. I promise you, if you really want something, and you put in the work to get there, nothing can stop you! I’ve wanted steady employment for years, and now, I’m succeeding!
Do not, under any circumstances, judge your journey on mine or anyone else’s. Your recovery, your journey, your life, your way.
I am so incredibly happy for you! That is a major feat and I am so proud of you. Keep fighting the fight and overcoming your obstacles :) you are awesome!
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