Fighting Back

Will this cause problems? Yes. Will it get the point across? Probably not.

Ok, this post was going to be about fighting a narcissist, but as I wrote the intro, I had other thoughts.

Narcissists will walk all over you, unless you start defending yourself, early on. Don’t get me wrong, they’ll do it, no matter what, but there’s a possibility that they’ll see that you’ve got boundaries. Yes, they’ll push those boundaries, but if you hold strong, you can keep them. The problem comes when it’s a constant, “I don’t mind” from the beginning.

There are loads of things that my mom “doesn’t mind”, which has made it so the jackass doesn’t just walk all over her, it actually twists things into being her fault. Yes, mom will put her foot down, sometimes, but it will then retaliate with some childish tit-for-tat. The best day of my life was when she got so angry with it, that she called it a jackass. Not to its face, of course, but oh... it was glorious!

Ok, so my original idea has now fused with the opening line to make something entirely different, and much more mature. I was going to fight everything it did, but that would make my mom’s life a living hell, because let’s face it, that’s not the best idea, on my part. Don’t get me wrong, I will fight it, and I will win, but maybe just on the important things. 

Example: Today, while I was at work, the jackass used my very expensive, very irreplaceable music stand, as its own personal coaster. Yeah, really. It has been told, thousands of times, that things, like my stand and the piano, are not to have drinks or food on them. Add on its ever-decreasing memory, and we find its crap everywhere. So, I threw it in the trash. I gave it one warning, and one only. From now on, any time I see something on my stand or the piano, it gets chucked.

Because of that piece of excrement, our house wouldn’t even pass for Section 8. There’s more mold than there is wall (in the basement, anyhow...), we’ve only ever painted three rooms, and only two have been done in the last twenty years, and so many other things that would take a year to type out. The jackass is so afraid of change, that it had a panic attack when mom finally put her foot down, and replaced our twenty-five-year-old couch (no actual padding, anymore... just fabric and springs).

Anyhow, should you find yourself trapped by a narcissist, make your boundaries clear, and do not, under any circumstances, allow those to be crossed.