Big Changes

 ... and some things stay the same.

In the last two months, there have been some incredible changes in my life. Life-altering changes. Changes that I'm not fully prepared for, but will happen, anyhow.

In December, I went out to a podunk town to look at a house that was within my price range. I put in an offer, but someone else bid higher than I could go. I obviously didn't get it. The very next day, in the same town, on the same street, another house went on the market. It's bigger, has a bigger yard, but it doesn't have all the fancy upgrades. I loved it, anyhow, and submitted an offer. Fast forward, and I'm just waiting on news to close on it! I'm supposed to close by the end of February, so I'm sitting on the edge of my seat, biting my nails, and hoarding every box from Amazon I get.

Adding to that was me having major surgery just over a week ago. It was planned, and incredibly necessary, but not the greatest timing. My recovery is going so much better than I thought. Bonus: I didn't need any narcotic painkillers after the dose they gave me in recovery! That one dose left me so manic, I thought I would die. My wonderful neighbor dropped me off and picked me up, and I'm pretty sure I didn't shut up the whole 20-minute ride home. Sorry, K!

Something that hasn't changed is King Henry VIII's controlling temper tantrums. Unless you count getting worse as a change. So I upped my game. He's not amused, but I'm highly satisfied. 

My point in telling you all this is that, despite all these changes in my life, I've managed to keep myself level and employed. Two or three years ago, one of these things would have sent me into a tailspin so fast that I'd be on the floor in 2.3 seconds. Friends, followers... It really is possible to pull yourself up from the deepest, darkest depths of whatever Hell you're living in. Never in a million years would I have thought I'd be going on two years at a full-time job, let alone buying a house! 

Never judge where you are by someone else's life. I'm still learning that, but I hope this message gets to the right person. I had given up on life. I had given up on myself. All my friends were married, had graduated college, had a family... and here I was, living with my parents well into my 30s, no husband, no college degree, no life of my own. Until I stopped focusing on what I hadn't achieved, and started focusing on what I needed to feel useful. For me, that was a job working with the public.

Working with the public, for me, was making me focus on helping others, rather than focusing fully on myself. Focusing on yourself is the shortcut to misery. Helping others will give literally everyone a purpose. I have a wonderful friend who, through no fault of her own, cannot have a child. The one thing she really wants, and she can't have it. Instead of folding in on herself, focusing on her misery, she makes baby blankets for others. To be perfectly honest, it's her example that was a huge stepping stone for what I needed to do. I needed to stop focusing on my own misery and do something to help others.

I started a job at a local company's call center. It's a great company to work for (in most respects), I have wonderful co-workers, and I work from home. I'm in a department where I feel like the customer does all the hard work, but the occasional detective work makes me feel like I'm useful to others. Not to mention, I'm in the quietest department, so the stress level is quite low.

I'm not by any means saying you shouldn't focus on yourself, or do something for you. There needs to be that balance between helping you and helping others. For instance, I'm taking a medical billing and coding course that will help me expand my career options! For me, it's a win-win. I can finally finish an educational program, and I'll be helping others.

Sorry for the weird, scattered post. Sometimes, the thoughts just keep going. One thought leads to another, which leads to another, which leads to another... If you know, you know.

I also have a new Twitter handle. Things happened and I lost the original one. Check me out there @BlogAboutMH86

Keep it real, my friends! Find the joy in your journey, don't compare yourself to others, and find your place.