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Monday, June 15, 2020

Enough Is Enough

Try all you like. It won’t change anything.

So, since my mom’s surgery, I’ve given the narcissist another chance. He didn’t change in the slightest, despite saying, yet again, that he’d “work on it”. Tonight, it ended. This time, for good.

He comes in, yelling at me, because I acted on a threat I’d made more than a week ago. I gave him more than enough time to simply take the mess he’d made in the living room, and put it in the back of his truck. It wasn’t done, so I put it on the porch. He knew there’d be consequences if he didn’t clean it up. I made that perfectly clear. Even someone as stupid as he is, could understand “Friday night, or it’s out of here”. It wasn’t done by Friday.

He’s always taken great pleasure in picking on me for every tiny thing. Apparently, his father did that to him, and he just kept the tradition going. But today, I made the decision that I will not allow him to make me feel that way, ever again.

He finally got his big boy pants on, and, for the first time in my life, apologized. I use that word loosely, as it wasn’t so much an apology as it was an attempt at a guilt trip. I told him that we were done, that he wasn’t to speak to me unless it was an emergency. My favorite part was when he used this: “... have faith in scripture ‘forgive seven times seventy’...” My response? I told him flat out that I have no faith in him, because he always says he’s going to do better, and he always comes back to fighting, yelling, and making me feel like crap. So, no, we have no relationship. Never have, never will.

I have no dad. Never have. Mom keeps saying, “He’s dome some good things.” Yeah... if you use “some” instead of “a lot”, you’re grasping at straws, and those good things are obviously the exception to the rule. She should have left him. Would have made her life a crap load better.

I don’t want to jinx it, but I’m looking into moving out pretty soon. Here’s praying it works. If I’m not out of here soon, he’s gonna wind up with a fist to the face.

I honestly have zero idea why I ever gave him yet another chance. I knew it would end like this. It always has. My mistake. Won’t happen again.

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